Killing fields

Country living can sometimes be brutal. There is death and killing all around. We have experienced a little more than our norm in the past day.

Our four kittens, who we got with their momma cat a while back, have defied some of the odds. Their momma took off after only a couple of days here, and they were left with us as their mommas--- mommas who have never had cats. They have lived and are beautiful. The reason we got them, however, was to kill mice. They are outside cats-- barn cats. The problem is that without a momma cat, we were unsure of their ability to learn to hunt. From what we have learned, a momma cat will almost kill a mouse and then bring it in for her kittens to finish off. I am unable to do that for them, so we weren't sure if they would learn.

I am pleased to report that they have learned on their own. They are becoming skilled hunters. We have seen them with birds before but had not seen them actually catch one- until last night. It rained yesterday afternoon and the birds were enjoying a bath in the puddles. Unfortunately, the birds chose the puddle right next to the kittens. We watched Blaze pounce and get the bird in his mouth in one fell swoop. They were all excited and played with the flopping and flailing bird. It died pretty quickly. As Kevin the kitten tossed the bird around, Smokey ran over with a freshly caught mouse in his mouth- YAY!!! They all four were slinking around the yard pouncing on bugs, birds, and mice. I guess it really is instinctual, and I am glad.

As we sat in the living room after dark, we saw a swallow flying right by the window, and then we saw a giant dog face come up behind it and catch it in his jaws. Ranger has gotten tall enough that he can stand on his hind legs and reach the window ledge easily. That poor bird had no warning. Except that it has its nest right above the porch, and it flies around taunting the dogs most of the day. Ranger was pretty pleased with himself. The only thing is, Ranger really cannot stand the feeling of anything moving around in his mouth. Be it a bug, a mouse, or a bird, he tries to stomach it but ends up throwing up every time. He is a giant baby- poor guy.

Those hunting kittens we have would love to be on the prowl at night too, however, there are other predators out at night who would love to have the kittens for dinner. We keep the kittens in a kennel in the stable to keep them safe after dark. The coyotes start their howling and what sounds like screaming as soon as the sun goes down. I would like to think the kittens are glad to be safe. The coyotes make all kind of weird noises and will often attempt to lure animals (particularly dogs) out into the field. They will hide in the grass and only one will make noise. From what I am told, they figure out whether the dog is a boy or girl and make noises that would lure the appropriate opposite sex. When the dog wanders out into the field, it is jumped by an entire pack of coyotes--- crafty creatures. We have heard them make noises much like sirens, sometimes like pigs, and occasionally a more traditional howl. We see them in the early morning out in the field, and they usually have a mouth full of some unfortunate animal.

Death is all around. Survival is not pretty in the animal kingdom. If we were an actual animal farm, it would be on a whole other level. Thankfully we still get our chicken and beef from the grocery store. It is a nice reprieve from the known cycle of life. I am by no means ready to know the cow from which our burgers come. Watching the dogs, cats, birds, mice, snakes, and coyotes is quite enough for me.

Isaiah 65:17,25 " 'Behold, I will create new heavens and a new earth. The former things will not be remembered, nor will they come to mind. The wolf and the lamb will feed together, and the lion will eat straw like the ox, but dust will be the serpent's food. They will neither harm nor destroy on all my holy mountain,' says the Lord."

Did you feel the mountains tremble?

It has been another week in the valley-- a busy week filled with a few more firsts and a few things that are becoming the norm. Last week you will remember hearing of the earthquake on the east coast. Before that one, there was also one that was a 5.3 in southern Colorado. It was news for a few hours before the one hit on the coast.

I have never felt an earthquake before. This one woke me up just before midnight. There was a rumbling sound (like a shuttle launch kind of rumbling), and the bed was moving. Isabel then appeared at my door. It woke her up too. And the boys--- my husband and two sons slept right through it and didn't believe us in the morning until we had proof on the morning news. Hmmm.... maybe we females have some sort of inner alertness even from childhood.

I also learned that (speaking of girls) when faced with a rattlesnake crisis, I would choose Isabel as my partner any day of the week over both boys. We had another one in our backyard with the dogs this past week (Thursday I think), and thankfully Harland was home and was the snake killer. My job was to get the dogs out of the yard. Isabel was in the car with her friend waiting for me to take them to meet her friend's mom. I had the help of the boys. They were running around trying to catch the dog I already had out of the backyard and complaining and asking for further directions the whole time as I tried to get the other dog out of the yard before the snake could strike. As Harland shot the snake and disposed of it, they could not keep the dogs still and they could not stop talking to me. When I had the early am snake kill when I was home without Harland, I had Isabel who listened for directions and obeyed without question. She seemed to be attuned to the main goal of the moment. I will try to teach the boys to focus so that next time they will either listen and obey or step aside and let their sister take over. I am sure they would love that.

We had Isabel's birthday this weekend which included a family fishing trip to the lake up on the mountain. It was 60 degrees and there were only about ten other people at the lake. After dinner, we threw on our jackets and fished for about an hour and a half (until dark). Nathanael was the only one who caught a fish, but we all enjoyed it and decided it needs to be a regular, peaceful activity.

Yesterday was another birthday party for some friends of ours. Theirs was a water gun fight at the mountain creek-- very simple and very cool. I am loving the simplicity. We even took our dog, Honey, to the creek party yesterday. She loved being out. She sat at Harland's feet and watched the festivities. She also met a couple of loose dogs that roam about the park. She even got to watch one of them tree a bear. I feel sure she had lots to tell Ranger when she got home. Maybe if he can listen and obey, he can go next time- haha!

Fishing, creeks, and dog companions: a reminder of just how far we have come in these five short months. Colorado has been good for us.

Psalm 97:4-6 "His lightning lights up the world; the earth sees and trembles. The mountains melt like wax before the Lord, before the Lord of all the earth. The heavens proclaim his righteousness, and all the peoples see his glory."

Cookies and Remembering

My entire house smells of sugar cookies and homemade butter cream icing. Yummy. I hope it airs out before dusk or some friends might come to have a cookie. The bears are extra hungry this year with the dryness and lack of berries and nuts. They are prepping for hibernation and have to pack in an extra 20,000 calories a day. This was a news story last night on the evening news so I have learned much.

Friday is little Isabel Faith's tenth birthday--- hence the cookies for her class tomorrow. They are only in school two days this week because of literacy testing. So... the birthday celebration starts on Tuesday for a Friday birthday. That sounds about right. She has always done things in a drawn out and dramatic fashion.

She was deemed "incompatible with life" at shortly after nineteen weeks into my pregnancy. I was encouraged (pushed really) to terminate. I was encouraged at every high risk visit-- every week. I would get myself together and be feeling positive and peaceful then I had to go to the doctor and would hear the same bleak forecast and cry all the hour drive home. She was wild in my womb-- flipping and kicking and hiccuping. I came to the peace that for some reason I was blessed to have this little girl in my uterus and to watch her grow and feel her life-- even if only for a season.

She was obviously not "incompatible with life". She was born early in a dramatic emergent fashion, but she screamed the loudest most beautiful scream for me to hear before being handed off to the NICU team. She was perfect-- just early. The doctors could not explain it. We were overwhelmed with thankfulness and with gratitude. The Lord had chosen either to fix what was wrong, or the docs were extraordinarily wrong on many accounts. We look back and see so many good things that came from those horrible few months. It was a defining moment for me. I was a different woman in August than I had been in May. That's how those things are--- for better or for worse, you are never the same.

I have an incredible story to tell Isabel every year on her birthday. She loves to see the pictures of her three pound self in the plastic box and the countless sonogram pictures we had from those awful weekly appointments. She knows she is here for a reason. We know that the outcome didn't have to be a good one. It is only by grace that she was fine--- others were not. It is an overwhelming and humbling thing to ponder why we were so blessed. God has greater thoughts than we do and all I know is that she is here and healthy and she is here for a reason. I struggled with many things in my heart those long months, but I came through stronger and with a new peace. I can't believe it has been ten years-- a decade of looking daily at that little face and remembering her story and the One who carried me through.

Daniel 3:17-18 "If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to save us from it, and he will rescue us from your hand, O king. But even if he does not, we want you to know, O king, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up." ( This was the verse I held dear every day of the pregnancy from 19 weeks to almost 33 when she was born.)

A Toyota and Target Practice

Rattler number seven on the property-- dead. I saw it on the gravel driveway as I came in tonight around 8:00pm. I ran it over and backed up and ran it over again. It was dead but still moving around quite a bit.

I drove on into the driveway and parked the car and proceeded to Harland's office by the stable to tell him and let him finish it off. He wanted me to get the gun and get in a bit more target practice. This time the snake was already hurt and definitely not standing up or rattling. I went in and suited up with my boots and my gun (and ear protection) and a big spotlight. I shot the snake three times and then Harland chopped off the head (and buried it) and the tail and threw the snake out in the field.

We have a new resident in our field. It is a red-tailed hawk. He sits on top of the electrical pole and scours the land. He swoops down and soars over the fields close to the top of the grass. I am thrilled to see him hanging out. He can feast on our mice and snakes. We see many hawks around town flying with snakes in their mouths (or talons-- I am not sure how they carry them) hanging down. I think our cats are too big for him now, thankfully, but our other critters are free game. He makes a loud shrill hawk noise as he flies, and I can assure you that our dogs are not amused. They watch him like a hawk- ha ha. He is a beautiful mix of graceful beauty and fierceness.

We have added to our arsenal since moving here: one might consider the hawk a natural weapon, along with our gun, bow and arrows, slingshot, knives, shovels, and hoes. Two rattlesnakes in two days annihilated by the Toyota Sequoia. I guess it could be considered a deadly weapon. I knew I loved that car.

Job 39:26-29 "Does the hawk take flight by your wisdom and spread his wings toward the south? Does the eagle soar at your command and build his nest on high? He dwells on a cliff and stays there at night; a rocky crag is his stronghold. From there he seeks out his food; his eyes detect it from afar. "

Distraction

I feel sure everyone is sick of snake stories, but I must tell you that I have rid the earth of one more today. It was much less climactic than my last snake encounter. This is the way I prefer them to be. I was in my car when I saw a rattlesnake in the road. I ran it over. Then I backed up and ran it over again. Then I went forward again and ran it over again. Then I backed up and ran it over once more. It was dead. At least that is one snake that won't make the trip a half mile down the road to my yard.

No more snake stories today--- moving on.

I remain amazed by many things that I see and hear here in the Valley. I have thought it was because I am new to the area, but I was surprised to see that that may not be completely true. In Bible study last night at our small log cabin church, I noticed that all of the ladies had their heads turned away from the video screen and toward the windows on the west side of the sanctuary. I looked outside and saw a gorgeous scene of the sun setting over the mountain in the midst of approaching storm clouds. The colors were mostly red and purples with some orange and yellow mixed in. It was beautiful. How refreshing to see that the folks who have seen these things their entire lives are still amazed at the beauty and still stopped in their tracks to take it all in. It was hard to take our eyes off of the view as we all listened to the video but looked at the changing sky.

I can add this to my list of the things that are different here. There is a freedom to enjoy here that I have not allowed myself to notice in other places. It may very well be there, but I have been too busy and distracted to see it. There are very few folks here that I would consider "fancy", thus the pressure to be dressed well and made-up is nonexistent. There is among the people here an unspoken comfort in their own skin. There is a transparency and an openness and a level of that enjoyment of life and of friends and of nature here that has been therapeutic for my heart.

I am hopeful that my family and I will continue to be distracted by the colors in the sun and the storms in the mountains and the valleys of life.

Psalm 19:1-2 "The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands. Day after day they pour forth speech; night after night they display knowledge."

Oh, Charles!

My Charles is home. He has returned to the prairie and to me-- his Caroline. The kids and dogs and I are relieved and thrilled to have "Pa" back at home after two very long weeks.

This past fourteen days have been filled with more than one exciting moment. I have always had an incredible respect for single mothers, but I have had a taste of it myself after being alone with my kids in the country. Whatever came up, I had to handle it.

I had a few minor things like the toilet overflowing, the kitchen breaker tripping a few times, driving the stick shift car in town on hills (and stalling on some of those hills), driving the giant truck in which my left leg doesn't even touch the floorboard, parking that truck in town, engaging and disengaging the four wheel drive on the truck including the hubs, multiple critters in the yard/field, and our not-too-bright kittens repeatedly needing rescuing after entering the dogs' yard.

I also had a couple of major things like the rattlesnake in the dogs' yard at 5am, my dog being bitten by that rattlesnake, flooding, and the three fugitives on the run in Colorado being caught down the road from us.

I am not sure how it is possible, but Ranger (our seven month old dog) knew that he was the man of the house while Harland was gone. He was on edge the whole two weeks, and I could almost hear his sigh of relief when Harland got home. Every night was filled with barking. Our dogs do not generally bark just to hear themselves. When they bark there is a reason. I have learned a few of the types of barks they are capable of doing in these two weeks-- much like a mother knows her child's different cries. There is nothing quite like the snake bark. Thankfully it is a distinct one. The other barks get my attention also, but it is different. I was up a few of the nights almost hourly to see what they were seeing. The moon is huge and bright right now, so they can see a LOT. We have had many, many coyotes this week along with a skunk or two and possibly a trash-seeking bear. I am so thankful that the dogs were not directly sprayed by the skunks-- if we had had to use tomato juice for the stench, Ranger would have been more like Clifford the big red dog.

It was a time of realization for me of the strength and abilities that come out when they have to and also the realization of the weaknesses we all possess. There was crisis after crisis but everything was relative. An overflowing toilet was absolutely insignificant compared with the shooting of the snake. The ability to think clearly and handle whatever arises comes from within. I was just thankful not to have wolves at the barn door or a festering infected leg wound to have to open up myself (like Little House on the Prairie).

Things are back as they should be here with my partner back on the ranch. The things that come up seem less intense with someone to share them with. In retrospect, everything seems less of a big deal. This past period in time will soon be forgotten, but I hope the kids were able to see my weakness and my reliance upon the One who is strong.

2 Corinthians 12:9 "But he (Jesus) said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."

Streams in the Desert

I mentioned the other day the extreme dryness we have been experiencing here on the front range. The mountain range we live next to is called the Greenhorn Mountains or the Wet Mountains. These seemed very much misnomers at least in the time we have lived here. They might be better called the Parched Mountains.

Until..... my wonderful yesterday continued beyond the morning rattlesnake kill and dog to the vet for a rattlesnake bite (he is fine thankfully). In the afternoon, we stopped in to visit some friends for a minute on our way home from getting Isabel from a playdate. It started to rain and in a matter of minutes the yards and roads were flooded and my friend's basement window wells were flooded and water was headed in to her basement. There was also the worst lightning I think I have ever seen. It was one bolt after the next after the next-- all with almost immediate thunder that made my insides vibrate.

We were waiting for it to let up just a little to make a run to the truck to head home. The ride home is all dirt roads so I was getting worried about the roads becoming impassable. It did not let up. We decided we just had to go anyway. We ran to the truck and Isabel and I both lost our flip flops in the mud and had to stop and dig them out. We were soaked to the skin by the time we got into our truck.

Our ride home was filled with prayers that we would make it. There were multiple rivers from the fields on the way home that have been dry forever and were now rushing across the dirt highway. If I had waited another few minutes to head home, I don't think I would have been able to cross them safely-- even in my giant truck.

The rain and lightning continued, and we drove into our driveway to find things flooded but not as bad as my mind had imagined. We ran in and began the clean up of ourselves and the house. I had left three windows cracked. The wind had knocked off all the framed pictures from a chest in the living room and the furniture and floor was soaked in the general vicinity of those windows.

I went out to see our puppies who were covered in mud head to toe. They were on the porch and looked freaked out. The entire back yard was flooded and a big mud pit. I glanced out into our first field and was shocked to see some of those long dry rivers I was talking about. We had two giant raging rivers cutting through the land all the way from the back hills, past the house, and on toward the neighbor's field and across the road. I watched as my shooting target milk jugs washed right down our new river. I took pictures to send to Harland, but they don't do it justice.

The dogs were on high alert after the snake ordeal and now flooding. They barked often and much, and I was up checking on what they saw constantly. The rain finally stopped and the kids and I crashed at nine. I was up at one to check on the dogs, and it was raining again. We desperately needed rain but all at one time is a lot to handle.

I just heard on the news that the rains are starting up again today after three pm. We are under another flash flood watch-- great. My plan is to be home before three and to remain thankful for the rain.

Matthew 5:45 "He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous."

Isaiah 43:18-21 "Forget the former things; do not dwell in the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland. The wild animals honor me, the jackals and the owls, because I provide water in the desert and streams in the wasteland, to give drink to my people, my chosen, the people I formed for myself that they may proclaim my praise."

A Bad Start

Don't you hate it when you are awakened from a dead sleep with something alarming-- like a fire alarm, security alarm, tornado siren, rattlesnake rattling? That's right-- a rattlesnake rattling woke me up this morning before dawn at 5. I actually heard the dogs first. The barking was not normal. It was constant and loud. I went to the window in the bedroom to see if I could see a coyote or something in the yard. As I stumbled to the window, I heard the rattle. It was easily heard above the dogs barking. Now what do I do?

Harland and Ben are out of town, by the way. This one was all me. I tried to process what to do and in what order as I was waking up. The two little kids were in bed with me and awake from the noise. I told them what was going on and that they would have to listen to me. Isabel came with me to the laundry room and Nathanael opted to stay in the bedroom. We threw on our boots, and I turned on the back porch light. Honey was at the door waiting for it to open. Her eyes said, "Help." Ranger was just off the porch with the snake cornered by the fence. I leashed up Honey and brought her in and gave her to Isabel. I had her take her to the front porch while I tried to get Ranger. He never responds to his name, but this time he did. He came right to me after making sure I saw where he had the snake. I took him to Isabel, and she held both dogs on the front porch. I told her and Nathanael that I was headed out to shoot it. They were not to come out and they needed to be prepared for five shots.

I then loaded the gun in the kitchen as I repeated over and over, "Lord Jesus, help me." I opened the screen door and I heard it still rattling. It never stopped since I first heard the dogs barking. It was coiled up with head up in the air. It was on the concrete next to the fence, by some old hot tub wires (which are not live), and I was concerned about the possibility of catching the house on fire. I had the fire extinguisher and telephone right inside the door.

I cocked the gun and steadied my hands and aimed and shot. I hit it right in the head. It dropped to the ground and the tail dropped. Dark blood ran on the concrete. It continued to move (as snakes do). I hollered out for the kids to hear me that it was dead and I was fine, but I was going to keep shooting. I shot four more times, hitting it each time.

I took a deep breath and headed out to get a shovel. The dogs checked on me when I came on the front porch. They had been perfectly silent since I got them out of the backyard. It is as if they know that barking would make the situation worse for me. I assured them I was fine, and realized the shovel was out by the barn. I was not walking in the dark to the barn, so I grabbed our mouse killing hoe. I went back to the snake to hopefully just fling it over the fence for now so the dogs could go back in. It was still moving and the head was still slowly striking. I went back in and told the kids to prepare themselves for some more noise because I was going to shoot it again. I reloaded and shot it one more time. This time I stood a little closer and the snake was thrown across the concrete slab by the force of the shot. He wasn't moving anymore. I threw him over the fence.

The dogs were sweet and very loving, and they were glad to see it was gone when I took them back to their yard. Ranger is licking his paw so he may have gotten bitten. I am taking him to the vet as soon as they open this morning to get it checked. Both dogs have been vaccinated but could still get a raging infection from a bite.

When I came back in, Nathanael was tearful and said that he had heard me praying so he decided to pray too. He told me he was sorry he was too scared to help Isabel with the dogs, but he did pray. I told him that was the best thing he could have done for me and Isabel.

After the sun came up, I went out with the shovel and chopped the head off. I flung it out into the field, cut the rattle off, and hung the body over the fence. The rattle is eight buttons. It looks like seven because I blew a portion of the eighth off with one of my hits.

It has been three and a half hours since the early morning ordeal, but my adrenaline is still pumping. I truly hope this is all of the excitement I will encounter while Harland is out of town. I would be fine if I never have to do that again. I now know, however, that I can do it.

Psalm 121:1-2 "I lift my eyes to the hills- where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth."